Life Sucks Shit
POSTED AT 03:09 PM

black_wings

Once again life sucks shit, it sucks fuckin shit and I will tell you later. For I must go to lacrosse right now (which does not improve my mood)
Listening to: Yellow Card
Feeling: bad

Life Sucks Shit Explanation
POSTED AT 06:17 PM

black_wings

Ok so like I said in the last entry I will explain to you why my life sucks shit, here goes. Ok so John Hague (party guy) asked me out on like Wednesday and I said yes because I had given up hope on my crush Matt Smith ever not liking Bethany and now he has finally given up hope on her (at least I am pretty sure) So I am about to go on my date with John and he is really starting to bug the living shit out of me and he told me he really likes me, so after the movie as much as I don't want to I am going to dump him. He is a nice kid and all but I don't like him that way and I don't want to keep leading him on. I really don't want to go out with him because he is really, REALLY! loud and obnoxious now. Oh fuck why did I ever go to the party?! WHY GOD WHY! So yeah I am in some deep deep shit and I truly feel bad about dumping him but I have to. So yes that is why life sucks shit, it did get better in lacrosse cause I finally got to start training as the back-up goalie! I can't catch a ball, bad at defense, and I am a bad passer. But I am an ok goalie (at least I was today, but today was pretty easy so it doesn't really count) Pracitice went a lot faster though because I was playing goalie and I didn't have to do as much running as everybody else (YES!) So yeah I hope your guy's lives are better than mine. Toodles until then! I'll probably blog again after the date. God help me get through this night!
Listening to: Ocean Avenue by Yellow Card
Feeling: bad/full of dread

Life Doesn't Suck As Much Shit Now
POSTED AT 09:51 PM

black_wings

Well its over (THANK GOD!) I dumped him at the end of the date. Movie was good, I guess I would have liked it more if I didn't have the thought that at the end I was going to dump him weighing on me, but it was still good. God the kid who plays Klaus is so fuckin hot! I LOVE YOU LIAM ATKIN!  I will also say that the date falls under the catagory of "Dates From Hell!" You know those people whose voices just carry naturally? Like they just have a really loud voice? Yeah he has one of those and all through the trailers (even if they are just trailers) he wouldn't shut up! If he didn't think a movie would be any good he would say it, LOUDLY! God it was so fuckin annoying! Then in the movie when he would ask me a question he would ask me REALLY LOUDLY! I could see the people in front of us talking and I knew they were talking about us. I could just tell. I felt so embarrassed. But oh well I'm just glad its all over. So yeah that was how my night went. How was yours? Drop me a message and tell me! The comment link is right down there! *points down* Till our next meeting! *black_wings poofs away*

Listening to: Yellow Card (don't know the song)
Feeling: bad/relieved/headache

My Life Lately
POSTED AT 06:40 PM

black_wings

Well lets see life lately has been going ok I guess, John keeps talking to me and it is really starting to annoy me (I knew he would though) and my crush Matt keeps ignoring the fact that I exist at school but then online we can talk for hours! He is so confusing, I think he is like that with all girls though because I never see him talking to any girls, the boy needs to stop liking really annoying shallow girls (aka cheerleaders). I'm serious! All the crushes he has had this year have been on shallow cheerleaders and they don't like him back and he feels crushed. Go for a none cheerleader! LIKE ME ASSHOLE! I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE BOYFRIEND FREE! Well I just got back from my lacrosse game today, we played Juan Diego and we kicked their butts! I finally got to go in today (I showed up late to the last game cause I got the fields mixed up) Can't say I did to much today cause I was only in for like 5 minutes! GRRR!!!!!!! I HATE BEING A FRESHMAN ON THE HIGH SCHOOL TEAM! I NEVER GET LIKE ANY PLAYING TIME! (not that I'm that good BUT STILL!) Oh well, John (lacrosse coach) said he would put me in for goalie for the 3rd half on Thursdays game, which I am both excited and scared as hell for. I have had one formal goalie training session for the first time in my life last week! I played goalie on the Jr. High team but no one ever really gave me any training so I developed a lot of bad habits. I can't make practice tomorrow cause I have prior commitments so I just get to train myself basically. I am going to have my friend shot on me tomorrow cause I finally got a chest pad today! (Yay!) I got to get some shin guards and knee pads, cause when I asked Ellen today if I could borrow her knee pads and shin guards for the game on Thurs. she wanted me to get my own. She is really protective of her stuff and that is cool, I need to get my own stuff anyway. Well that is about it, checked out "Face Off Lacrosse Store" today (to buy the chestpad) and it was cool, and it wasn't all the way in Sandy like Tribal West! Well that is all I have to say for now, hope you are well! Drop me a comment! I enjoy reading them!
Listening to: Anarchy In The UK by the Sex Pistols
Feeling: meh

Today
POSTED AT 04:09 PM

black_wings

Well today has been pretty uneventful, I went to my Butoh class this morning (for the first time in a month! we've had 3 weeks off and I had Fiddler practice one saturday) It was a ton of fun! I am sad though because like none of the boys showed up and Arwen wasn't there!  But that is ok cause Jeremy was there and I still love Jeremy!  WE started choregraphing (sp?) our final piece today, we got two pieces done and Jeremy said anybody who wants a solo should go home and work on it, so I am going to see if I can come up with anything during the week, already got my music picked out!  After Butoh I just came home and watched Avatar The Last Airbender cause I like that show! And that is about all, going to try and watch some more Fushigi Yugi later cause we got part of the 2nd season from the library! CHICHIRI, TASUKI, AND NURIKO I LOVE YOU GUYS!  After that I'll just watch some more anime and then go to bed! Fare thee well! *poof*

Do not forget the tongue in your dance

                                                       -Hijikata-san (founder of Butoh, or one of them at least)

Listening to: valse de la lune (its on the Wolf's Rain soundtrack)
Feeling: so so

Defying Gravity
POSTED AT 09:52 PM

black_wings

Defying Gravity from the musical Wicked

GLINDA
Why couldn’t you have stayed calm, for once! Instead of flying off the handle -- !

I hope you're happy
I hope you're happy now
I hope you're happy how you've
Hurt your cause forever
I hope you think you're clever

ELPHABA
I hope you're happy
I hope you're happy too
I hope you're proud how you would
Grovel in submission
To feed your own ambition

GLINDA & ELPHABA
So though I can't imagine how
I hope you're happy
Right now

GLINDA
Elphie, listen to me. Just say you're sorry!

You can still be with The Wizard
What you've worked and waited for
You can have all you ever wanted -

ELPHABA
I know
But I don't want it - No!
I can't want it anymore

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by
The rules of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes
And leap...

It's time to try defying gravity
I think I'll try defying gravity
And you can't pull me down

GLINDA
Can't I make you understand
You're having delusions of grandeur?

ELPHABA
I'm through accepting limits
Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost

I'd sooner buy defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye, I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

Glinda, come with me. Think of what we could do - together!

Unlimited
Together we're unlimited
Together we'll be the greatest team
There's ever been - Glinda!
Dreams the way we planned 'em

GLINDA
If we work in tandem

GLINDA & ELPHABA
There's no fight we cannot win
Just you and I, defying gravity
With you and I defying gravity

ELPHABA
They'll never bring us down!

Well, are you coming?

(GLINDA decides to stay behind.)

GLINDA
I hope you're happy
I hope your happy now that your choosing this -

ELPHABA
You too--
I hope it brings you bliss

GLINDA & ELPHABA
I really hope you get it
And you don't live to regret it
I hope you're happy in the end
I hope you're happy my friend

ELPHABA
So if you care to find me
Look to the Western sky!
As someone told me lately
Everyone deserves the chance to fly
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who ground me
Take a message back from me!

Tell them how I am defying gravity
I'm flying high, defying gravity
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!!

GLINDA
I hope you're happy

CITIZENS OF OZ
Look at her
She's wicked
Get her!!

ELPHABA
Bring me down!

CITIZENS OF OZ
No one mourns the wicked
So we got to bring her -

ELPHABA
Ahhhh!

CITIZENS OF OZ
--Down!

Feeling: sad

LOL!
POSTED AT 01:15 PM

black_wings

LOL! You guys look at my new icon! Its Ryuchi's pink bunny! (gravitation) LOL! I LOVE IT! *hugs new icon*

Listening to: In The Moonlight Gravitation Soundtrack
Feeling: happy!

...I don't know
POSTED AT 06:38 PM

black_wings

I HEART RYUICHI AND HIS PINK BUNNY!!!!!!!!
Listening to: Spicy Marmalade by Bad Luck ;-)
Feeling: happy

Bird Catcher In Hell
POSTED AT 08:11 PM

black_wings

Just got back from Bird Catcher In Hell by one of my senseis S. Glenn Brown gotta love Brown Sensei. Here is the synopsis of the play from the little program.

 "Ukai is an ancient Japanese style of night fishing which is so peculiar that partries of observers watch as the fishermen work. Ukai employs cormorant birds on leashes who dive for fish, as is their nature, but who can't swallow the fish because of a metal ring aroudn their neck. The fisherman haul back the bird with the leash secured to their neck ring, and then have them disgorge their fish."

The story, told by a wandering monk, chronicles hte journey of a bird catcher, Ukai, his love Maya and friend Hoichi. Froma Buddhist point of view the bird catcher's profession breaks the tenant not to harm or kill any sentient being. Ukai is caught betweeen the need to survive and his beliefs.

The characters experience the three poisons and five hindrances of Buddhism-lush, greed, anger, fear, conceit, ignorance, foollishness, and doubt-as they are pulled  into the eight levels of hell by Yama, The King of the Underworld. These poisons and hindrances are not unique to Buddhism but are universal to the human experience making the story accessible to all audiences."

So yeah that is the story and my Butoh teacher, Arwen, was Yama The King of the Underworld (love ya Arwen! ) I also saw my other Butoh teacher, Jeremy, there and my underlying suspicion that he was gay was confirmed. He was with this guy who was obviously gay, and so my suspicion was confirmed. Which is a real shame that Jeremy is gay because he is hot! WHY ARE ALL THE SMOKIN HOT GUYS GAY?! WHY! *sighs* Oh well, well I must be off! I gotta pracitice my trumpet, festival is on Tuesday and Evergreen is going to kick some major ass at festival! GO EAGLES! WOOT WOOT!

Listening to: Anti Nostalgic by Bad Luck
Feeling: butohy

Band Festival
POSTED AT 03:12 PM

black_wings

So today was band festival, it was at Hunter Jr. High and my school (Evergreen) did really well! We got a 1 and a 1- (its like an A and A-) I thought we would get like twos cause I didn't think it was all that great, at the end of our last song "When Summer Takes Flight" by Robert W. Smith the clairnets got ahead a couple measures so it screwed the rest of the band up but we pulled it together for the final few measures. I was up till 4 am last night working on my Romeo and Juliet final project for Sorenson. I decided to draw costumes that Juliet and Mercutio might wear in the play, I did a Renaissance version of the costumes and a more modern version because I wanted to! I was mad though because when I was inking the punk Merctuio outfit this giant drop of ink dropped onto the paper! So there was this huge smear of black ink on one of his shoulders and I was mad. So yeah, while I was doing this assignment I watched Camp, Futurama, Family Guy, Proud Family (hey there isn't much else on at 1 am in the morning) Lizzie Mcguire (once again 1:30am) Kim Possible, and Braceface. Then I woke up at like 6:30 to get ready for school. So I am going to finish downloading these Gravitation tracks, burn them, eat dinner, and go to bed! Goodnight!
Listening to: Shakunetsu Blade by Bad Luck
Feeling: tired

HP Trailer Is Coming!
POSTED AT 04:55 PM

black_wings

Like the title says, the Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire Trailer is set to show before Will Ferrel's (sp?) new movie Kicking and Screaming! Which I do want to see not just for the HP trailer (well that is a major plus!) but because it looks funny! So yeah that is there for you as an update! Also! May 7th ABC is showing Chamber of Secrets (4 hours long so that is like 1 and a half commercials   but oh well! During this four hours they will be showing an actual GoF trailer (I don't know if it is the movie theatre version but still!) they will also be showing clips from the movie, behind the scenes stuff and the golden trio shall be hosting the event! Definetly want to watch that guys (even if it is 4 hours long) It will start at 7pmEST Oh! one more word on the GoF movie trailer, if you don't want to see Kicking and Screaming then WB will be posting the entire trailer online on May 13th. Hope you are all well and rocking out! To quote my friend Nick T. "Don't stress about life. You won't survive it anyway..." Love ya tons Nick!
Reading: Tale of Two Cities (for English)
Listening to: Led Zepplin
Feeling: ok

Today
POSTED AT 06:57 PM

black_wings

Well today was ok, woke up and went to Butoh and had a blast! Stuart I you! Then I went to my trumpet lesson and I got Flight of the Bumblebee so that should really help to improve my technique and range. Plus it is fun to play! Then I came home and played some more Zelda, I am in the process of finding all the Gold Skulletells (sp?) i can as a kid before I grow up. Then I ate a ton of rice and didn't feel good, so I watched like 2 hours of Spongebob Squarepants and fell asleep in a rather uncomfortable position. Then my family went to the Training Table without me cause I said I didn't want to go. I told them to bring me back a soda though (then my sister drank like half of it! Grr! ) Then I watched the All That 10th Anniversary thingy and that was ok. I don't think it was the best they have ever done but I still liked it (Jamie Lynn Spears and little gymnastic girl I fucking hate you! Grr! You are not funny rot in fucking hell you two! ) Then my family got back from the Training Table and now I have no dinner and now I wish I told them to bring me something other then soda back! :`-( Oh well though, I guess I will make myself a pb/honey/bannana sandwhich later. Toodles!

-When You Reveal Yourself In Front Of Others, You Are Free

                                                                         -S. Jerry Gardner

Listening to: Flight Of The Bumblebee
Feeling: bored/tired/hungry

So Alone
POSTED AT 08:25 PM

black_wings

I just feel so alone, I need somebody so badly it hurts. There is a constant ache in my heart that plagues me constantly. It feels like my beating heart is being ripped out of my chest. It hurts so bad... I need someone soon but I am afraid to have them. I am afraid of commitment. How can someone dedicate their entire life, their entire being to another? I don't get it. But I need someone, I need someone soon before I go insane. Somebody save me from this living hell I'm in...please. I need you whereever you are. Come and find me please...please. Bring Me To Life...
Listening to: Shining Collection by Nittle Grasper
Feeling: alone

MONSTER SPIDER HERE I COME!
POSTED AT 09:05 PM

black_wings

Alrighty you guys, so I just got back from the Monster Spider auditions! They totally kicked ass and I am so excited for callbacks tomorrow! Monster Spider is a Japanses style play I got to workshop last summer and ever since that I have been in love with Japanese theatre! I am really hoping to get the head puppeteer (don't know how to spell what it really is) for the Fisherman, because he was the puppet I got to work with over the summer and I fell in love with him! I My Fisherman! The auditions were totally rocking! For the first hour it was like an hour Butoh class (with Gardner Sensei whom I ) Then the last hour we all got do our one minute "whatever" in front of everyone else! Stuart did an Edgar Allen Poe poem using a puppet he had made! Darn you Stuart you stole my idea! But it is ok cause I still love him anyways! Steve did "Warm Welcome" by Rowan Atkinson As his piece. It is a "Warm Welcome" from the devil as he greets the newcomers into hell! I love that monolouge! "Catholics, I'm sorry but it turned out that the Jews were right" XD! I love it! Also on the audition thingy it said "anything!" you wanted to do so Connor being Connor plugged his iPod into the wall, turned it to some rock song with no words, got a six pack of apple juice (in those little cans) and chugged for a minute. It was the funniest thing I have seen in a long time! Connor I You! Well yeah that is about all that happened this week! OH WAIT! I FORGOT! I went to this free concert up at the U of U (go Utes!) on Tuesday and it rocked my fuckin socks! Violet Femmes were headlining it and the bands that were before them rocked my fuckin socks! (at least the ones I heart, we got there kinda late) The first band we saw was called Larusso and I only caught like the last 3 songs they did and I have fallen in love with them! I bought their CD and I am listenig to it right now! (they are a local band by the way) they had some majorly hot guys and I have fallen in love with the bassist! I shook his hand when I bought the CD cause they were like "Oh hi! What is your name?" and I said my name and then they introduced themselves and I got to shake their hands It rocked! Then a band called "One More Down" came on and they were pretty cool, I liked em. Then "Royal Bliss" came on and they rocked my fuckin socks! I have got to get that cd! Then I saw "Sherwood" and they were pretty cool, check out the cd (hot guitarist) then I don't know what was up with "Fruit Bats" because only one member came out and did the songs so that was weird. Then Violet Femmes came on they rocked my fuckin socks! Total kick ass concert! At the end my mom (yes I went with my mom go ahead and laugh) and I were going to "liberate" on the the posters for the concert so I could put it in my room (i am liberating small posters and sticking them on my door) but some chick already liberated it so I was pissed, cause I saw her do it! We got there like 5 seconds to late. So then we stole, I mean "liberated" one of the giant signs with an arrow pointing to the concert and while we were doing it and couple of the guys from Larusso (a guitarist and bassist) and some random chick came up and they were like "Are you stealing that sign?" and I was like "Yes don't tell" and they promised not to. It was the perfect ending to a totally kick ass night! Wow that was a long entry, sorry bout that! Feel free to comment! I love feedback! Toodles!

OH WAIT! Here is the link to Larusso's page (the record company's page and you can listen to little clips of a few of their songs, I highly suggest it! http://www.hibiscuszombie.com/larusso/selftitled.html 

Listening to: Leave The Light On by Larusso
Feeling: rockin